Monthly Archives: January 2012
Desperately Seeking Attention, Hunstman Drops Out of Race
MYRTLE BEACH, S.C. – In what longtime political experts have called a “political Hail Mary”, Jon Huntsman attempted to revitalize his faltering bid for the Republican presidential nomination by announcing the suspension of his campaign on Monday.
Smug Romney Embraces Elitist Nature
CAMPAIGN STRETCH LIMO, SC – After two top place showings in Iowa and New Hampshire, Republican frontrunner and former hair model Mitt Romney has dropped his carefully crafted common man persona and finally embraced his natural state as a pompous dandy unconcerned with the quiet desperation of the average American’s life.